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  • Writer's pictureTonya Lampley, Author

Feeling A Little Blue?

Updated: May 2, 2022

One of the reasons depression is so prevalent is because while we’re busy living life we’ve never thought about what life is or how to live it. It’s complicated, trying to figure out how to human. We never learned anything about higher consciousness, spirituality, or how our thoughts and beliefs create our reality. We weren’t told that self-knowledge is the foundation of any successful life, and that knowing our strengths, weakness and tendencies matter. If we don’t know what’s keeping us back, how can we grow?

We weren’t told to pursue our passion or uncover our genius and that in order to do that the right conditions must be met. Things like faith, belief, introspection, inner peace and quiet and a heart that is focused on service and not money is the pathway to a rewarding career and sustainable success. Every single person has a level of genius. There's something that each of us does really well...better than others. Most of us weren’t encouraged to figure out what that is so we have no concept of The Thing we’re supposed to be doing. Consequently, we can’t find work we’re good at so we aren’t making good money, which means we can’t pay bills or buy things we want, which can often lead to depression.

We know very little about the true nature of relationships. We want a prince or a king to come rescue us but we don’t know an evolved man is seeking the same and we blunder through life wondering and lamenting that we can’t find Mr. Right. If we haven’t evolved ourselves enough to be considered Mrs. Right, if we ever do get lucky enough to find Mr. Right, we won’t keep him because we have too many faults and too much baggage.

Another reason for the blues is because we're conditioned from an early age to see the world in terms of how it affects us. When you have that perspective life is certain to let you down. We were never told the true and right perspective is to view life in terms of our impact on the world. That one shift right there can lead someone away from the blues and toward the light. Instead of taking everything in and feeling hurt, we should live our life outward. Turn our energy toward the world. Find out what impact we can make, who we can help. If we make that shift and keep down that path, we discover our true self and eventually we will be rewarded with peace, joy and happiness.

Without the right perspective, knowledge and the proper tools life can feel hard. I know for me, the dark days I had in life were because I had lost myself. I wasn’t living my own life. Constantly putting everyone else’s needs above my own. Swallowing my hopes and dreams. Ignoring self-care. Lack of contribution. Simply put, I wasn’t showing up, and as soon as I recognized it and began reclaiming pieces and parts of myself, I found I could maintain stretches of happiness. Before long it was my default state.

If you are feeling dissatisfied with life, my heart goes out to you. I can relate. It’s one of the reasons I became a certified Life Coach—to help people build satisfying lives. Make sure you get connected to me on my website by signing up for my newsletter. I often share resources like this that will help you on your journey. Definitely email me if you’re struggling and need some guidance. I charge for sessions but if you’re in a dark state, I’m always available for a session or two. My sincerest wish for anyone is that they get to a good place.

Most importantly, if you feel you are clinically depressed or feel the few simple shifts I recommend below won’t be enough, please reach out to a licensed therapist. You don’t have to go it alone. I recommend Shawn Scott if you are in the Cincinnati area.

Here are some practical steps you can start with:

First, Be kind to yourself. Extend all the grace and compassion to yourself that you need.

Second, commit to yourself that you:

A) are worthy of a good life


B) you will turn things around and find the life you’re supposed to be living, the life you deserve

Third, sometimes depression is more chemical than emotional. Did you know that things like sugar and alcohol can cause depression? Back in the day chocolate did it for me. It could trigger anxiety like nobody’s business. I was so unhealthy back then. Now a little here and there doesn’t bother me. Also make sure you are hydrated. Dehydration is also a trigger for anxiety.

Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables. Antioxidants improve oxygen and circulation to the brain which will improve brain chemistry. Equally important are Omega 3 fatty acids. I chew the gummies by the handful. Vitamin D and magnesium both affect mood. Get a good quality multivitamin that contains sufficient quantities of both. If your depression is brain chemistry related, in a few months you’ll see improvement.

Exercise is also beneficial. Moving your body also gets oxygen to the brain and exercise causes us to release feel good hormones like oxytocin. If you can walk outside, even better. The sun, which causes your body to produce vitamin D is good for raising happiness hormones.

You'll have to will yourself to do it at first, but if you can push through, you’ll see an instant improvement in your mood. If you can’t get out or it’s too cold, exercise indoors. And you can always purchase an artificial sunlamp. They’re scientifically proven to boost your mood and will adjust your circadian rhythm if you’re having difficulty sleeping. I used one in the past…they work!

Next try to work on your psychology. Like attracts like. Positive thoughts bring more positive thoughts. Find a scripture or affirmation that brings you comfort or joy. Say it over and over throughout the day…twenty times of you have to. Put on a song or movie you love. Call a friend, get a puppy, visit a baby nephew…anything that will shift you from a negative state to positive one. Do it often enough and you’ll have enough momentum to stay there.

Remember...perspective matters. Simple shifts in our thought process; not making things about us, seeing the world in terms of how we want to impact it—not how it impacts us, finding larger purpose for our lives, and committing ourselves to a spiritual path, as in, beginning the journey of uncovering the meaning of life and why we’re here. All these things can get us out of the “Why Me?” and “Life Sucks” and on to a healthier view of life.

To your journey,

Tonya Lampley is an author and Certified Life Coach. She is passionate about living life to the fullest and uses skills learned from her work as a coach as well as lessons from her own journey to write articles providing tips for successful living and to tell stories of hope and personal triumph. Her debut novel was titled A Taste of Love and was a National Indie Excellence Awards finalist. Her short story titled Birthday Surprise received honorable mention in the Writer's Digest Short Story Contest. Her first non-fiction book Bad Men will soon be released. For more information about Tonya and her works please visit


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