Today's lesson comes from a surprising source...The President. First let me say, I don't get caught up in the political fray. I tend to be more moderate in my views and think it's futile to let politics turn us into enemies and cause the need for us to keep Tums on our nightstands. I do believe that leadership matters...now more than ever in a world that's growing increasingly more complex, but I'm not one to throw political barbs.
Having said that, I'm also a truth seeker. I believe calling it like I see it. It's only when we face the truth about things, that real change can happen. Our leadership is lacking at the current moment, politics aside. The nation is in trouble. It's not a Democrat or Republican thing, although both sides bear responsibility. This is a failure of a nation to establish clear direction and values, and one without the necessary solidarity and esprit de corps required to navigate any crisis. When you harken back to times of War in this nation, everyone banded together. The women even filled jobs in factories that the men vacated when they were called to war. Shout out to Rosie the Riveter. The rugged individualism that in modern times has made America so great and attracted migrants from far away lands to the world's playground, in the midst of a pandemic, has now become a noose around our neck.
But enough about that problem. I'll write about that some other time. Today I wanted to talk about dysfunction and I'll use the president as a clear example.
We all have certain parts of our personality that are rooted in dysfunction. Some childhood wound or hurt, or perhaps something in our adult lives that left an imprint on our soul by devastating us or causing us to be afraid. Some of the wounds are really big, some are small, and luckily, some have scabbed over. It's imperative we look for the wounds that haven't healed, especially the larger ones because those tend to lead to some sort of dysfunction. If not, it will just keep showing up over and over in our lives, keeping us from the joy and accomplishment we'd be capable of if it weren't there.
Let's take a look at our Dear President:
President's Trump's personality mode is to fight; warrior. He draws his identity from that. He's always praising and talking about the 'beautiful' military. I'm sure you've heard him say on more than one occasion about the virus..."we're in a war!" Because it's his default mode he operates under the flawed premise that there's always something to fight. Assuming this, he creates imagined enemies...the Dems, the press, and now the virus. When the psyche is healthy, people with a warrior mentality make great generals and do great in other leadership roles where taking charge is important, but when dysfunction is attached to a personality, the success of the person has the tendency to be mired by the dysfunction; limited in scope and effectiveness.
He's missed a key opportunity to halt the pandemic because his ego is busy looking to satisfy the mode it's stuck in; fighting. It searches Twitter, the press box, CNN, everywhere, seeking to confirm the lie it's created...'someone's against me and I must fight,' occupying the majority of his time and keeping him from accomplishing what he needs to accomplish in order to be considered successful.
One of the tenets of personal growth and a crucial characteristic of leadership is recognizing personal flaws, knowing tendencies, and growing beyond what no longer serves us. It takes a surgical eye to recognize dysfunction in ourselves. It takes courage to admit the truth and strength to break the ties that bind us to dysfunction and install new modes of being. If he could give up the 'fight' and approach each day asking how do I lead the nation through this pandemic, we'd see a different outcome.
How about you? Have you peeled back the layers of your psyche to find the thorn of dysfunction that's keeping you from all that you could be? Is it anger, feeling un-loveable, victimization, life owes you something? You'd be surprise how sneaky those dysfunctions can be.
Find it and let it go. It's crucial to your development as a happy human being. If you need help on how to go about it, I'm a certified life coach...give a shout 🙂. You can contact me privately or post a message in my forum by clicking the members tab at the top of the page. Your question just might help someone else.
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